Walking to school alone: hi-vis, route practice, readiness

There is no set age for walking without a grown-up. It is your call as a parent, and so is the responsibility. Schools usually just want to know in writing whether your child may leave on their own or who is collecting them — without that, the after-school club won't let them go.

Age is therefore a poor yardstick. Ask about specific skills instead: Does your child stop at the kerb on their own, even mid-chatter? Do they look right, left and right again, or just turn their head? Do they know what to do when the green man is showing but a car keeps coming? Can they say no to a friendly adult offering a lift?

Be realistic about the route, too. Five minutes along a quiet street with a pavement is manageable much sooner than twenty minutes that include crossing a busy dual carriageway with no lights. Younger children are poor judges of how fast a car is approaching, and a friend on the other side of the road distracts them easily. So start with a shorter stretch and add independence bit by bit, rather than all at once on the first day of term in September.

Reflective material doesn't glow by itself; it bounces light back to its source — the driver. So it only works where headlights reach: low down and on the side of the body. A tag tucked behind the back or high on the shoulder looks nice, but a driver coming towards your child barely sees it. A pedestrian in dark clothing is spotted only at the last moment, while reflective kit can be seen from many times further away.

On a lit town street nobody will make your child wear it, but from November to February the morning walk is in half-light or darkness, and the difference in visibility is just the same. The simplest rule for your child: reflective kit is like a woolly hat — in winter you don't leave the house without it.

Try it together: one evening, shine a torch at the school bag and coat from a distance. Whatever lights up is working. Whatever stays dark needs adding or moving.

Being able to reach you mostly reassures you; it doesn't replace your child's own independence. A phone in hand at the crossing is more of a risk — agree that it only comes out on the way in an emergency. Children's smartwatches with calling have the advantage that a child doesn't treat them as a screen full of games; what to look out for is covered in Smartwatches for children: a gift that brings responsibility.

Bikes and scooters are a different matter from walking. A young child shouldn't cycle to school on the road alone, and a well-fitting helmet is worth insisting on every time. Scooting on the pavement is fine where it's allowed, as long as your child is considerate to people on foot.

Practise the bus journey just like the walk: where to get on, how many stops, when to press the bell and what to do if they miss their stop. The answer should always be the same — get off at the next one and ring you.

Starting school is a big change for a child even without walking there alone. What helps new starters with their worries is in A gift for a new starter: based on what they fear and look forward to. Some children get used to a new situation best through a story they star in themselves — in a personalised book, the hero looks like your child from their photo and has their name.